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We ended up on a half moon. The evening was all noisy. By eleven, all the blabbering dispersed to stillness. Quietness. My world stopped. My body froze. My brain kept on circling. My heart kept on pounding. My eyes are swelling. I can't stop myself from crying. My sight is filled with darkness in this well-lit room. Lying down the floor, lost.
I was listening to a Camera Obscura song called "Country Mile". Suddenly, I decided to stand up, and thought of packing for a lonesome trip to nowhere. I punched in some clothes, bottles of water, food supply, wet wipes, tissue papers, pens and a drawing notebook.
"I feel lost.", the song said. Yes, I really do feel lost right now. I don't know how to pick myself up after spewing hurtful words. All I could do now is cry. Actually, I have been crying everyday without fail for three weeks now.
How sad it is to be apart from someone who was once dear to you. Who could have thought that I would be driving down the sullen road again.

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FIRMOO.COM ---->Click!

I am excited for my package!

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2011 could have been both great and ugly year for me. It is like I rode a continuous roller coaster ride all year long. I have watched people come and go. I have watched myself in growth and deterioration. Too many things happened and I couldn't imagine that it was all packed in just a year.


2011 could have been both great and ugly year for me.
The first half of the year had been already a big blow for me. People came and left. I had been extremely attached and been an asshole at the same time. I had been too foolish and irresponsible, but it's okay. I had learned a lot from everything that happened.


It is like I rode a continuous roller coaster ride all year long. 
In the middle of the year, I was featured as the Axe Goddess of the week. It was not really a big deal, but I consider it as a turning point. After all the strangers either praising or dissing my every photo, I had been able to regain my self esteem a lot from being dumped and being a self-confessed junkie.


I have watched people come and go.
I could consider that latter half of the year as a big change in my life. I painfully watched people go out of my life. Maybe I pushed them away, but I think it's fine if that's what it takes to get things straightened up. Even though a lot of people left, there is one who came, who made a big impact in my life. Maybe it was a big leap for me.

I have watched myself in growth and deterioration.
I never thought I would even have a person seep through my life that easy. It is contrary to what I used to inculcate to myself. I always thought I wouldn't let another person walk though because I am so fed up with all the nonsensical drama about heartbreaks. I absolutely don't know.
He and I were there, and it just happened. Now almost the other half of my year is focused on him.

Too many things happened and I couldn't imagine that it was all packed in just a year.
Hence, I still learned a lot. You'll never know who would leave, who would stay, or whom you will push away. Things are not imminent. Sometimes, what you expect are not going to be in the way you want it to be. If things went wrong and you tried it all, maybe they're just not for you. Your time will come eventually, but most of the time, you got to do a lot of wait and work.
Maybe the past year was for me; Maybe it was not. I have only one thing to say for the exchange of years: "2011, Fuck you a lot; 2012, Bring it on, bitch."






2011 could have been both great and ugly year for me. It is like I rode a continuous roller coaster ride all year long. I have watched people come and go. I have watched myself in growth and deterioration. Too many things happened and I couldn't imagine that it was all packed in just a year.

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I had only slept for two hours today and my dad woke me up in an ugly way. I can't have any decent conversation with anybody right now.

Uhm yeah, it said in my Facebook status that I had thrown my phone out the window yesterday afternoon. I was so angry that I exploded so my phone turned out to be my focal point, just like a crazy woman giving birth.

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